September 23, 2011 No such thing as slow…
In a world of bigger, stronger, faster philosophies, quick fixes, 30 day shreds, overnight deliveries, instant messaging, and fast food, it’s no wonder that as a people we’re becoming less apt to take time to smell the roses. So what gives?
I started a post on CrossFit dating, and surprisingly enough, the topic included many of the same observations I’ve decided to include in this post….so look out. You may be in for a bumpy ride.
“Faster isn’t always better.”
I’ve been preached to religiously (haha…that pun worked well) about the ills of dating in a hurry, and the harms of rushing into a physical relationship.
As a CrossFitter, free from fear of pain and fatigue, literally callused to and by the tasks we surmount with each workout, it’s almost unfathomable that we would avoid anything which challenged us physically…and yet the more I think about it, the more sense it makes.
It is harder to abstain from a physically intimate relationship with someone than it is to simply give in.
Thanks to the wonderful world of Google, I can tell that the only search term that comes up more frequently than “perfect body” is “CrossFit dating.” For that reason, I know I’m probably not getting too far off the beaten path tying relationship talk into this primarily CrossFit blog.
While I’ve achieved many of my goals in the gym, I’ve accomplished very few in terms of romantic relationships…and why? Maybe because for too long I was ok with the “unknown and unknowable” philosophy we talk about in the gym. Show up, put up, shut up and you’ll be better off for it in the long run. Well, you can’t expect for that idea to work outside the walls of the workouts.
It’s not about setting one PR and moving onto the next, or at least it shouldn’t be. Similar to a PR (personal record) though, you may need to get a little dirty; chalk up, tear your hands a few times and even bleed before you build up those calluses…though emotional calluses tend to scar worse. Worse in the sense that we carry them with us, wearing them on our sleeve right alongside our hearts. Like a CrossFitter, recognizable by their scraped up shins, strong arms and calluses, you can usually spot a person who approaches dating like an AMRAP…as many rounds as possible, as many reps as possible, as many relationships as possible. And what good does it ever do ‘em?
Without getting too ooey gooey for those just tuning in to find something about Protein Powder or how to do the perfect snatch (easy there….I’m referring to one of the Olympic lifts) I can say that I’ve learned a lot through CrossFit and I love it, but there’s more to loving than personal records, constant variation, and high intensity. So why all the searches on CrossFit dating?
I get it. I really do. We, as a cult-like community at times, are all bound by the same camaraderie and competition that yields results. We speak a jargon of sorts only understandable to other CrossFitters…and let’s face it, the workouts do a body good, so why not find another CrossFitter to spend your post-WOD (workout of the day) time with. For this reason, I imagine the CrossFit dating site is going rather well.
In the deepest stage of by infatuation with this regimen I keep referring to, I didn’t think for a minute that I could ever even be attracted to someone who wasn’t a part of the “cult.” I figured for sure that I’d want someone who could tell me what their “Fran” time was and be impressed by my lifting PRs and butterfly pull-ups. But how shallow and naive was I?
My life no longer revolves around the gym, the workouts, or the even the conversations I used to have…though I could probably afford to spend more time on them all. I’ve realized, as I’ve been away and consumed in time and thought by another world, that there’s so much more I have yet to learn about truly meaningful “personal records.”
At 25, I’m not yet staring down the barrel of spinsterhood at cat ownership just yet, nor am I worried that’s how I’ll spend my later days, but that isn’t to say I haven’t started wondering about that Mr. Wonderful out there somewhere, and whether or not he’s waiting for me to find him, or preparing to find me. To be honest, hell, I don’t even know if I’m actually ready to be “found” yet, but entertaining the idea is just that…..entertaining 
But here’s where I look back and examine the past. What when wrong? Why didn’t it last? Was it all a wash, because I went too fast?
I guess that depends on who you ask
But one thing is for sure, and it’s true in lifting, CrossFitting, and in life…. timing is everything and patience is key. Though these aren’t principles we seem to recognize anymore in society. We’re high-tech, high-speed, and always seeking to fulfill an insta-need.
Well here’s to smelling the roses, and avoiding a few more pricks.
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